Wednesday, May 25, 2016

Wall Around My Heart

KSL had gotten approved for his apartment, after a nail biting three days.  He was going to sign the paperwork later next week.  His relationship would end once "The ink was on the lease."  He was apprehensive about pulling the ripcord, but he knew it was for the best.  He was very solemn, and she felt her own heart sink for him.

She had shown him what she had on the rules so far, and he told her that he would look at it again after all the dust had settled on the end of his relationship.  He seemed fairly open to it, although he agreed with her that he had no idea where their relationship would really go after this breakup.

They clinked glasses to toast to a brighter future, even though they had no idea what the future would hold for either of them.  She accepted this quietly, preparing both to never see him again, and for him to come bursting into her apartment on the day of and ravish her.  If there was anything to be counted on, it was the uncertainty of which way the wind was blowing his sails.

They walked a few blocks over to a theatre photo event. Everyone was going to be there, and she looked forward to seeing people she hadn't seen in awhile.  There was also an outdoor art festival happening at the same time, so once they arrived KSL went to say hi to someone she broke away to look at the exhibits.

She turned around to see KSL and her ex talking.  The "uuggh" from I Love Lucy escaped her mouth and she turned back around and walked to the next exhibit.  She was admiring the art when she felt a presence behind her.  She hoped that it was KSL, but it was the ex.  They chatted and walked down to check out the rest of the exhibits together while they talked.  It was nice conversation, and she broke off once they got back to say hi to some friends.

He followed.  He stood too close as he also said hi to the same friends, making it appear as if they came together.  She became uncomfortable...this was giving people the idea that they were still in a functioning marriage.  Then they'd never understand when it became public that they were apart.  This felt deceitful, even though it hadn't become public.

Anxiously she waited, engaging the group in an involved conversation, then moving onto the next group of friends.  After the initial hellos in the new group...

He followed.

She tried this a few more times, to no avail. At this point she finished the water that KSL had bought her on the way, so she went to the nearest trash can to dispose of it.   The trash can was full, as was the one across the street.  So she started out to the end of the block where the next cans were located.  She was on her way back when her phone started ringing.

It was her ex.  He wanted to know if she was leaving.  She was beyond irritated at this point and snapped at him that she was throwing away her water bottle, but stopped short of what she really wanted to say, which was that where she went was no longer his concern.  He hadn't been this clingy when they were married, and she was getting sick of it.

She approached TM and gave him a hug, and told him briefly what was happening.  He said "Yep, he's just two feet to your left right now."  She took a deep breath, tearing up.  TM told her that it was going to be okay, and brought her over to his side when they staged the photo of everyone.

KSL brought up the rear behind her for the photo, and her ex tried to edge him out.  "Now I know what sex with me would feel like" KSL joked later, commenting on their similar stature.  On the other side of TM was PJ and AB, so it was as if they built a wall around her.  She was so happy that even when she was being dark and terrible and petty, they were all there for her.  The final photo was going to be a weird combo of all her support systems...and her ex.


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