She didn't know who else to ask. That was the nice part about being married, she always had someone to at least pretend to take care of her, or at least get other people to. When she had her gall bladder out she had her two friends watching her until her ex got home. This time around for her tonsillectomy though...she had no one.
That wasn't entirely true. Goldie would always be out of town or too busy, it seems that SD was the same level of busy lately. She didn't really fully trust anyone else to actually be loving enough to take care of her....except for her ex.
Her mother volunteered immediately, but as she texted KSL, she would most likely slit the rest of her throat after 10 minutes with her mom. Plus she didn't want to be taken back to her mother's house where her ex was still living, along with her sister and her boyfriend.
"I should be able to help" He replied, a little too vague for her liking.
"Thanks"
She felt like it was a real desire of hers, to have him take care of her. It was also a really really scary prospect. No doubt he would be good at it, he had always been a great caretaker...but it also felt like almost too intimate of a service to be providing. Boyfriends took care of their girlfriends like this...friends don't really take care of friends this way. She should have never asked him.
Of course, as they discussed on her birthday a couple of weeks ago, they were different from the typical friendship or relationship. They defied social norms...and she didn't think that this would be one of them.
She was getting way too into her head about this.
Monday, March 27, 2017
Friday, March 24, 2017
Second Dates....or Were They?
Nameless had shown up again, out of the blue. He apologized for ghosting and said he would make it up to her with dinner and drinks, to start.
He was in the sciences and they actually balanced each other out really well. She told him right before they met up she visited the modern art museum and was overwhelmed with how much she missed it. "It was so quiet...I loved it."
He laughed at her good-naturedly, obviously charmed by her extreme introversion. He was clearly an extrovert, the kind that always wanted to eat and drink directly at the bar. He also made fun of her for her actions, but in a gentle flirting manner.
After they finished their tapas they moved onto the bar next door. She made fun of how he didn't like sweet drinks, and he gave her a hard time when she wanted to pet a dog that was brought into the bar.
"You know they beat that dog."
"They do not!"
"They do, look how sad and dejected it looks."
"Stop it!" She laughed.
They headed out after 4 drinks, and he mentioned he was in Liberty parking. She didn't know where that was, so he just said good night and started walking away.
She was a little shocked but just shrugged her shoulders and started walking home. About ten minutes later a huge truck swerved from the road next to her. For a brief moment she thought "This is it, this is how I die."
It was Nameless. He was surprised because he always took that road home and never saw her before.
"To be fair I'm not normally heading home this way unless I've been to that bar."
"Do you want a ride to your place?"
"You see that building at the next light? That's my building. You don't need to drive me 1/3 of a block. I appreciate it though."
"Well," he said, laughing, "Let me know when you get home safe."
Minutes later she texted him "Ugh you are such a bad influence on my drinking habits. Just getting home, have a good night"
He replied "That's awesome. Hopefully I can be a bad influence on other things."
She wanted to ask him how he was planning on doing that without even a hug goodbye but she refrained and decided to go with a joke.
"Ha! Like what? Abusing dogs?"
"I wasn't the one abusing the poor dog...talk to those owners. Horrible people"
"Stop it that dog was fine! Haha"
"Whatever let's you sleep at night."
"Shut up, you know that dog was fine. You are just playing on my insecurities" She followed up with the Love Languages Quiz link and said she was passing out, but to take the quiz.
She woke up to his text "Physical Touch first, then Acts of Service."
"Interesting, your second is my number 1 usually. Then what?"
"Quality Time and Words of Affirmation. Zero on gifts."
"Gifts are the worst!"
That was the last she heard of him, for who knows how long.
He was in the sciences and they actually balanced each other out really well. She told him right before they met up she visited the modern art museum and was overwhelmed with how much she missed it. "It was so quiet...I loved it."
He laughed at her good-naturedly, obviously charmed by her extreme introversion. He was clearly an extrovert, the kind that always wanted to eat and drink directly at the bar. He also made fun of her for her actions, but in a gentle flirting manner.
After they finished their tapas they moved onto the bar next door. She made fun of how he didn't like sweet drinks, and he gave her a hard time when she wanted to pet a dog that was brought into the bar.
"You know they beat that dog."
"They do not!"
"They do, look how sad and dejected it looks."
"Stop it!" She laughed.
They headed out after 4 drinks, and he mentioned he was in Liberty parking. She didn't know where that was, so he just said good night and started walking away.
She was a little shocked but just shrugged her shoulders and started walking home. About ten minutes later a huge truck swerved from the road next to her. For a brief moment she thought "This is it, this is how I die."
It was Nameless. He was surprised because he always took that road home and never saw her before.
"To be fair I'm not normally heading home this way unless I've been to that bar."
"Do you want a ride to your place?"
"You see that building at the next light? That's my building. You don't need to drive me 1/3 of a block. I appreciate it though."
"Well," he said, laughing, "Let me know when you get home safe."
Minutes later she texted him "Ugh you are such a bad influence on my drinking habits. Just getting home, have a good night"
He replied "That's awesome. Hopefully I can be a bad influence on other things."
She wanted to ask him how he was planning on doing that without even a hug goodbye but she refrained and decided to go with a joke.
"Ha! Like what? Abusing dogs?"
"I wasn't the one abusing the poor dog...talk to those owners. Horrible people"
"Stop it that dog was fine! Haha"
"Whatever let's you sleep at night."
"Shut up, you know that dog was fine. You are just playing on my insecurities" She followed up with the Love Languages Quiz link and said she was passing out, but to take the quiz.
She woke up to his text "Physical Touch first, then Acts of Service."
"Interesting, your second is my number 1 usually. Then what?"
"Quality Time and Words of Affirmation. Zero on gifts."
"Gifts are the worst!"
That was the last she heard of him, for who knows how long.
Wednesday, March 22, 2017
A Year's Worth of Pent Up Aggression
BFF had decided to come over for a minute, and had to ask what her apartment number was. She sighed and texted it to her. How could she call herself her best friend and still not know where she lived after a year?
If there was anything BFF did well, it was make herself the victim. That's what she proceeded to do for 3 hours. It was the most time she'd ever spent at her apartment.
Amongst all their drama, the Improv troupe was breaking up. Mostly just with the Troupe leader, but either way it made for some awkward drama.
At the end of the conversation, BFF was trying to play the victim...and it was time that she didn't get away with it.
She told her how much it had hurt her. How she had lost her husband and her best friend all in the same year. She had just disappeared.
"It just seemed like you had people, you didn't need me." BFF said, tears in her eyes.
"I didn't have any other choice did I? You left me no other choice."
The conversation kept spiraling around issues, things that happened a year ago until just a few short weeks ago.
In the end, BFF thought that things had ended up strained by on a right path.
The next morning, she woke up furious and angry with how everything had gone. Their friendship was essentially over.
If there was anything BFF did well, it was make herself the victim. That's what she proceeded to do for 3 hours. It was the most time she'd ever spent at her apartment.
Amongst all their drama, the Improv troupe was breaking up. Mostly just with the Troupe leader, but either way it made for some awkward drama.
At the end of the conversation, BFF was trying to play the victim...and it was time that she didn't get away with it.
She told her how much it had hurt her. How she had lost her husband and her best friend all in the same year. She had just disappeared.
"It just seemed like you had people, you didn't need me." BFF said, tears in her eyes.
"I didn't have any other choice did I? You left me no other choice."
The conversation kept spiraling around issues, things that happened a year ago until just a few short weeks ago.
In the end, BFF thought that things had ended up strained by on a right path.
The next morning, she woke up furious and angry with how everything had gone. Their friendship was essentially over.
Thursday, March 9, 2017
A Dead End Prospect
Levi was in a polyamorous relationship with Improv leader. His head was shaved and his beard was short but full. He almost always wore a sharp hipster hat low over his grey eyes. He oozed sex appeal wherever he went. She frequently saw him out on dates with other woman, though he didn't seem to stay with one for long. She'd run into him occasionally while she was out at events, and they hadn't really spoken except for one meaningful conversation where he had comforted her after her separation. His words meant a lot to her, so she had included him on her birthday letter. A day or so later he responded.
"Hello my dear,
This is perfect because I've been meaning to take you out for a proper evening. I will think on what you've said and propose something.
Love, always,
-Levi"
A smile plastered across her face. She was so freaking easy to please. Just show her a little attention and she melted. She showed everyone the email, she was giddy.
A few days later she saw him at the Improv show and greeted him with "Your email made me swoon a little. I showed everyone."
Levi gave her a sexy smile and said "Well that's nothing compared to the date I'll plan. I just have one question: are you ready?"
Her eyebrow raised, amused. She hadn't had the opportunity to flirt in a very long time. She found that although she hadn't been using the muscles, they were still just as strong as ever.
"Oh I'm ready. I've never been more excited for a date that I know isn't going anywhere."
It was his turn to raise an eyebrow as he said "How do you know that? Penny, I don't have any pure intentions for this date."
"No?"
"None whatsoever."
"Well, at least I get a proper evening first though right? Then the impurity will begin?"
"Yep...are you ready? You better get ready."
"Oh I'll be ready. You better make it so hot that I need to Facebook Live the whole thing."
"It'll be Facebook Live Worthy. Just you wait. Like I said, I'll think about it and let you know soon."
"Hello my dear,
This is perfect because I've been meaning to take you out for a proper evening. I will think on what you've said and propose something.
Love, always,
-Levi"
A smile plastered across her face. She was so freaking easy to please. Just show her a little attention and she melted. She showed everyone the email, she was giddy.
A few days later she saw him at the Improv show and greeted him with "Your email made me swoon a little. I showed everyone."
Levi gave her a sexy smile and said "Well that's nothing compared to the date I'll plan. I just have one question: are you ready?"
Her eyebrow raised, amused. She hadn't had the opportunity to flirt in a very long time. She found that although she hadn't been using the muscles, they were still just as strong as ever.
"Oh I'm ready. I've never been more excited for a date that I know isn't going anywhere."
It was his turn to raise an eyebrow as he said "How do you know that? Penny, I don't have any pure intentions for this date."
"No?"
"None whatsoever."
"Well, at least I get a proper evening first though right? Then the impurity will begin?"
"Yep...are you ready? You better get ready."
"Oh I'll be ready. You better make it so hot that I need to Facebook Live the whole thing."
"It'll be Facebook Live Worthy. Just you wait. Like I said, I'll think about it and let you know soon."
Wednesday, March 8, 2017
Birthday Dates
"As you might or might not know, this month is my birthday. Since a majority of you are going to be out of town or seeing shows, I decided to do something different.
Last year was really rough for me, and getting through it is mostly due to the people getting this email. I want to continue to foster those friendships in my next year of life.
If you decide to accept this, here is the full deal: You will take me out on a date for my birthday. It can be for an hour, a meal, a day, a whole weekend...the choice is all yours.
I know we are all busy people, so I'm going to put a deadline of the end of the year on this.
Things to keep in mind:
Last year was really rough for me, and getting through it is mostly due to the people getting this email. I want to continue to foster those friendships in my next year of life.
If you decide to accept this, here is the full deal: You will take me out on a date for my birthday. It can be for an hour, a meal, a day, a whole weekend...the choice is all yours.
I know we are all busy people, so I'm going to put a deadline of the end of the year on this.
Things to keep in mind:
- Because of my stupid thyroid condition I can't be seriously physical. I can do short easy hikes, and anything you'd like to expose me to I will try and accomplish.
- I love food.
- I love drinking, especially checking out new bars.
- That being said, new experiences are cool too. Take me to a museum, film, whatever!
- It can be with other people but make sure we get quality alone time amongst it.
- Be Creative, or let's do what we always do...I just want to spend time with you.
Wednesday, March 1, 2017
My Funny Valentine Part 2
She decided avoidance could be the name of the game for the rest of the day. She needed to not think about that text for awhile, and get used to the idea he was gone first.
He was gone. He had left early. He didn't care to fix anything between them before he left.
He didn't care.
After she had calmed down, she parsed out the text message calmly and rationally.
He thanked her for her kind words. A little stiff, but grateful. He seemed to thrive off of Words of Affirmation, so she was sure he meant it.
No hard feelings on his end? What hard feelings could there be, she had been awesome! An amazing girlfriend/non-girlfriend. In the end though, it was most likely his slightly awkward way of saying his feelings hadn't changed either.
He said they "should try" to grab a drink, as if it wasn't going to work out in the end. Which is fair...maybe he was just being polite. He would "let her know." He hoped everything was doing well. What could she really say to that? He never said he was doing well...she didn't feel like she needed to answer that. Did she even need to answer at all?
She did end up responding.
"I'm sorry to have missed saying goodbye. Let me know your schedule and you find out so we can meet up. I hope everything is going well so far."
It would have to be good enough. Now it was time to put it out of her head for a couple of months.
He was gone. He had left early. He didn't care to fix anything between them before he left.
He didn't care.
After she had calmed down, she parsed out the text message calmly and rationally.
He thanked her for her kind words. A little stiff, but grateful. He seemed to thrive off of Words of Affirmation, so she was sure he meant it.
No hard feelings on his end? What hard feelings could there be, she had been awesome! An amazing girlfriend/non-girlfriend. In the end though, it was most likely his slightly awkward way of saying his feelings hadn't changed either.
He said they "should try" to grab a drink, as if it wasn't going to work out in the end. Which is fair...maybe he was just being polite. He would "let her know." He hoped everything was doing well. What could she really say to that? He never said he was doing well...she didn't feel like she needed to answer that. Did she even need to answer at all?
She did end up responding.
"I'm sorry to have missed saying goodbye. Let me know your schedule and you find out so we can meet up. I hope everything is going well so far."
It would have to be good enough. Now it was time to put it out of her head for a couple of months.
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