Friday, April 1, 2016

The Oscillating Osculation

"Did he use tongue with the director?" Sleuthy asked. "That is a really good question." She answered.  "I'm thinking yes though."

The more she thought about these kisses the more offended she got.  Why wasn't she good enough for tongue? Was it some sort of Bro-out?

Goldie said it was totally a thing that millennials did.  "It's a sort of 'Disney Friends With Benefits' kind of thing.  It's been going on for about 5-7 years." Goldie messaged over Facebook.

"That's more insulting than not being kissed at all."  She messaged back.  Then she got angry and I said "I want to fucking slap him."

"That's second base." Goldie replied.  She wasn't in the mood for jokes though.  "I'm just so furious right now Goldie.  I'm like, embarrassed and enraged."

"Don't be," Goldie messaged back.  "I'm sure it meant more to him, this is just the easiest way for him to excuse his behavior without getting all deep."

"Yes I did kiss the director with tongue, but SHE started the tongue." KSL said when asked.  "Okay, then I'm a little insulted." She said.  He looked hurt and replied "Look, I'm sorry my history is upsetting you--"

"It's not about the history, it's about mutual respect." She cut him off.  "You know what, forget it."

"No, you can't do that shit anymore, we had an agreement.  What?  Tell me." KSL gently took her arm and guided her to sit down again.  She took a deep breath and looked into his eyes.

"Okay, fine.  In the future if you ever man up and admit that you like me, you need to stick your fucking tongue down my throat.  Got it?"

His eyebrows raised in admiration, and he nodded his head.  Then they high-fived.  Looks like the bromance was back on.

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