Sunday, March 27, 2016

Am I Okay? Asking for a Friend...

She got out of the car and he laughed at her trying to gather her things as well as balance her beverage on top of the car.  Finally she got her flowers, cake, drink, and purse in her arms, and he said goodbye.

Before going to sleep, she knew she would remember everything that happened in order to write about it the next day.

Then the nightmares started.  One of the people from the play was suddenly in the back of her car, saying "It's never anything until it's something" a line from the play.  She woke up, and her memory was now out of order.  The night was coming back fractured, in flashes.

She hadn't even had that much to drink, it was just the nightmares that jolted her memories and combine it with her new reality.

She remembered the cast singing her Happy Birthday.  The cake was small but absolutely delightful.  The top wasn't snapping in, she reminded KSL to remind her of that fact when she picked it up out of the car.

They got to the bar for their drinks, but found the bar uncomfortably hot.  They took off their hoodies and discussed going to a table after placing their order.

"We could....no, it's crazy." KSL said.  "What?" She asked.  "No, forget it."  She pushed him, knowing what he was going to say before he said it.  He wanted to go to Lookout Point.  In fact that is what he suggested, and they tucked their drinks into their hoodies and walked back to the car.

They looked down on the city and talked about a good friend of his who knocked up a girl and married her, then decided he would have neither.  The kid just turned one, and the guy was still living with his mother.  Still, people gave the girl shit for breaking it off with him.  It was a very sad situation that she might find herself in sooner rather than later.

Another flash: In the car to Lookout Point, they were talking about house parties.  She was upset that she never got to have house parties since she was lacking a house.  "Well," KSL said "You and I might be hosting our own New Years Eve party this year."

Flash: "Obligatory 'sorry for the crazy shit' text post.  He asked why, she said it had been 15 minutes so of course she was overthinking it.  He texted back "Don't do that.  It's fine."  After a minute he texted her good night.

Flash: She couldn't remember what they were talking about, but she was animated.  Suddenly she realized he had taken her hand.  It felt warm, right, and heavy on her own.  She felt safe, grounded.  She looked down and told him that if they were to do anything, she would want to do it the right way.  Not start anything until they were out of their respective relationships.

Flash: His eyes were this hypnotic mix of green and brown flecks, and it was as if he was staring into her soul.  He had these tiny freckles on his face that you could only see if you were very close.  They were endearing.

Flash: His lips were soft, and tasted like just the sweetness of the margarita he drank without the booze.  Though sudden, the kisses were easy.  They found a flow right away without any awkwardness.  It was as if they were choreographed, they were so perfect and sweet.

Flash: She told him Sleuthy friend thought that she would be his unicorn.

Flash: "You know these are just friendly" KSL said.  "Sure they are," she replied as they kissed again.  He was surprisingly gentle.  She had expected more roughness from him.  But he was right, they were friendly kisses.  Introductory Kisses.

Did she lean in for a third time?  Or was that part of the dream?

She didn't sleep much.  She had a lot to overthink about.