Awkward

"I'm getting nervous about having sex with this guy...I know eventually we will get to that point. When we did it, it was quick with no actual feelings, so it was different. This will be the first time I've had sex with feelings in a long time, and I'm afraid it will make me awkward."  She was trying to be friends with KSL, so they were talking about her current events.

"It will most likely be the opposite of awkward

Especially when you don't have to deal with the other party's batshit craziness

But in all seriousness

You'll be fine

It'll probably be better than anything we did"

"Hey, there is always the chance he'll cry about his ex after...she's WAY prettier than I am. But seriously, he's not as...bold...as you are. I'm just afraid it will be so slow that I won't be able to go through with it. I have *time* to get nervous."

"Well, that's up to you then to pace it out. Although if he's as understanding and honest as you've said, perhaps actually talking about this with him might alleviate some of the tension" 

She almost laughed out loud at his comment.  It's that easy huh, just talk to him?  Also, his comment seemed almost...upset?  Jealous?  She knew she'd pissed him off with her happiness.

"As to your other comment, exes are often exes for a good reason. For all the back and forth my ex and I went through, we kept coming back to that reality. Attraction and emotion may still be there, yes. But its not the same. Its residual. Even if one or both of us would like to believe otherwise, its over. So, dont fret about his ex. As for my boldness, it isnt always the best route. It reeks of rash decision-making, springs from a deep well of insecurity, and might just be my worst characteristic"

"I'm not too worried about his ex. We are different enough that I know he's actively not wanting what she was all about anymore. I have to disagree about the boldness though. I mean, with some people you were bold with it was a mistake I guess, but for me it was your best characteristic. Like I said when I was angry, without the orgasms you were just the second worst friend I ever had. Bold is hot. I'm just scared about this because it is the opposite of what we did, and I'm afraid it will also lose all of the passion too. It's too soon to really talk about it. We've talked pretty boldly about other things relationship-wise, but we've never actually talked about sex. Or being exclusive really, so I feel like bringing up sex would be presumptuous of me."  

She hesitated, then asked if it had been awkward with her. 

"No"

"Good."

"Indeed it is.  And was."

"And shall be again...just with other people."