"Hey Penny! Heeeeeeeeeeey! Hey Penny!" he stage yelled jovially. "Whhhhhhaaaaaaaaaaat?" She yelled back, imitating him. What followed was several dad jokes that he had hilariously committed to memory.
"So, I did a dumb thing the other day." She started.
"Ahhhh man, I had one more joke." He pouted. She sighed. "Tell your joke."
"No, tell me about the stupid thing you did."
"I offered to go with the ex to a wedding next weekend."
"That is stupid. That's almost as stupid as asking my ex to go to the awards show with me. She went back and forth on it for awhile but she went. It was nice actually, it didn't end up being weird at all. I thought it would be." He mused.
"Why do we do this to ourselves? We don't want them back. They hurt us. Why do we feel the need to reach out again?" She asked.
"Because we are hopeless romantics with a martyr complex." He said. He might be right.
After picking up the coffee they went to Costco to do some big box shopping. He made fun of her as only he could after she got cranky not finding what she was looking for. "We did not drive all the way to the capitol for you to get some burrito bowls, we are finding this shit. What else are you looking for?"
"Razors. I've decided I'm just buying the cheaper guy's razors, it's a racket." They walked around, and she suddenly flashed back to that night and realized she had not "woman-scaped" enough for an intimate encounter that night. He immediately noticed her change in thought and asked. She told him.
"Don't worry about it. I've dived into deeper jungles than that." She wrinkled her nose and said "Yeah, well...I didn't expect you to be diving into anything that night. At all." It was weird how she felt more grossed out thinking about hairy vaginas than she did thinking that his tongue had been in them, and then her. Her feelings for him really felt gone. She looked at him and didn't feel an ounce of romantic spark or electricity.
They wandered into the movie section, a dire mistake for them both. They found several movies that seemed to be available for a limited time, childhood favorites. He ended up with 5 or 6, and said that he would give her the DVD copies of the Blu Rays. She paid for two of them, told him it was his late birthday present. He thanked her, and she felt that kinship coming back. It felt good.
They decided to head back home and watch one of the recently purchased movies.
