"I'm at home. My friend who's here just told me some fucked up shit and laughed at my fears." Pilot had been texting her upset. His friend was dying of cancer, but he was just offered a job at NASA. His world was a little shaken.
"You don't need that shit." She replied.
"I want out. I just want to talk."
"You want to meet up somewhere for a couple of hours?" She immediately regretted it as soon as she sent it. It was already 10:30 at night, and she had work the next morning.
"Please," came the response "I'm a mess."
She arrived at the bar they decided on at 10:47. She texted him that she was there, and he said he was on his way. At 11:13 she texted "How much longer are you gonna be? I'm officially that creepy girl at a bar by herself."
In reality she was sure no one noticed her, but she was feeling self-conscious by the minute.
"Almost there," He answered 15 minutes later. "On 1st Street."
At 11:30 she sent "They are doing last call so we don't have that long."
"I'm sorry, I'm a mess. I'll just go home."
She was furious. She had waited almost an hour for him, and now he was just going home? How drunk was he already? She was concerned about him going home on his own.
"Dude, I'll at least drive you home, just make it here."
No answer. She got in her car and drove down 1st street for several blocks. She didn't see anyone walking along the street.
Was he lying to her the whole time?
"Well I just drove down 1st and didn't see you so I guess I'm going home."
When she parked her car she looked at the several text messages that continued to stream in from him.
"Oh. Ok"
"Uh. I'll just go home. Sorry"
"I'm a terrible person"
"I shouldn't even try to like people because I hurt them"
"Honestly. You should block me because I'm a horrible mess of emotions that no one wants shit to do with"
She finally answered "Hey, I shouldn't go the extra mile for near strangers either. Guess that just makes us even." It was the meanest thing she had ever said to him. Would ever say to him.
"Works for me." He replied. She got ready for bed. Two rapid-fire texts came through as she turned out the light.
"Sorry. I can't cope with shit"
"I'll just leave. I was a block from the bar. I'm sorry. This is why I don't put myself out there"
This is why SHE didn't put herself out there. She felt hurt that she had been long hauled by Pilot, by almost a whole year.
