"IL and I just talked about how I need to get up from the table, and that's what I did. And I honestly feel amazing right now. I'm getting enough space to myself, enough sleep. I don't have to worry about him as much even though I still do because I'll always care about him, it's just a weight lifted."
"That is so amazing!" He friend exclaimed. "Seriously, people in my group at work never get to this point in their lives, and I want to like, bring you in for a talk or something."
"You should bring in IL, she's the one who got me this far. I wouldn't have been able to see things without her shedding a light on them."
It was nice to talk about how content she was despite not being entirely happy with her apartment. Things were rough all over, and it looked like they really didn't have a choice about staying in the place for another year. Anywhere else was going to be more expensive, and better the devil you know when it came to a lack of home repairs.
"You look amazing" her friend said to her. "I always wanted you and KSL to get together, but maybe this is always the way it was meant to be for you two. Leaning on each other without having romance cloud judgement or let it become something that gets weaponized in the heat of an argument."
"We are weird together. It's like, a practice relationship. Things that I would normally do that I know aren't healthy, I can draw boundaries without fear of loss of love, because he never loved me to begin with. I'm learning lots of lessons that I need to learn. There are times that I wish there was more, and times when I wish there was far less. I think it's been good for both of us, but honestly who knows what goes through his head. All I have is myself, and I'm only responsible for my own actions. It's always something I keep in mind now. Instead of playing a victim, instead I think about how to change myself to get the outcome I need. So far, it's working."
